Wednesday, June 30, 2004

wonderwoman! Posted by Hello
Now if only I could remember where I parked the helicopter (if only my underoos still fit).

The entire first season on dvd.


Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Stupid Nature

We were out enjoying our back yard this afternoon. Noah was running around like a lunatic. Brendan had 2 (million) kids over to play. Chris came home and we were chatting on the deck while the kids ran around. Shortly Noah came toddling over, showing us his arm and was quite proud of it.

On his arm was a tiny little ant. Noah called him baby (I think..but it could've been Lady since he had met a lady bug or two over the weekend) and as he was showing me, the little ant crawled all over his arm and onto his hand. I then watched in horror as the little ant SUNK his teeth (?) or whatever into his flesh! So I swatted it off and squarshed it into the deck. Mashed it to smithereens! It was D-E-A-D dead.

We continued chatting and Noah sat between us and babbled away. I noticed another ant on him and then another and yet another. Yup you guessed it, he had disturbed a nest.

And disturbed he did. He had basically chopped in half. There were about a million VERY angry ants. Milling all over one corner of our back yard. They all sorts of object in their hands (?) that I never ever care to identify. They were kickin ass and taken names (or something). They killed a couple earwigs (yay ants) and we saw more than 3 pill bugs rolled up into their little ball fetal position.

Meanwhile Noah is lunging at the hump of dirt longing to play with them. PLAY!

Is this a preview of what my life, with 2 boy children and 1 (semi) adult male in my life? GOD help me!
As I type this there is a baggy with 3 dozen LIVE crickets in it sitting on my computer desk and 3 frozen BABY mice in my freezer.

I need some girls.
And I don't think the dogs count.

Brendan has recently discovered musical humour. "My Dingaling" "big Balls" etc. Do you KNOW how many times I hear him sing the line (with the accent and all) "I have great big balls of FIRE!". This is NOT appropriate dialog for the grocery store. Yet that's what I found upon entering the produce section!

Send estrogen QUICK!

Run Run Run Run away

So I ran lastnight with someone that will be taking the half clinic with me. We did 10k at such a good pace.
It was one of those runs where I could've gone forever. But didn't since our training begins on Saturday (MORNING! YIKES!). Anyway it was nice to run and not feel like I am running at 110% racing through 12k trying to keep up with my two "friends" ahead of me.
Low and behold my legs didn't hurt climbing stairs this morning.

This weekend marks my 1 year anniversary to running, my group is getting together for a run and then dinner. We all during our couch -5k beginner clinic and have been running together ever since.

Man this summer holiday thing is really cramping my blogging! Not enough time to read enough blogs! Not enough time to write enough posts!

Damn those children! DAMN THEM and their summer holidays too!!

Monday, June 28, 2004

My latest stained glass project. (yes I know we need new windows) Posted by Hello

And I have pictures!

Are you digging the retro orange and brown interior? Actually the trailer is from 1978.
It's in mint condition. It's been in C's family the whole time.

Sunday, June 27, 2004

Hello Mudda, Hello Fadda

Or, The Good The Bad and the Ugly of My Weekend:

The Good
The weather was a little warmer than expected so it was gorgeous in the afternoons.
The Bad
The mornings were chilly and the lake was far too cold to swim in (though B did anyway..brrrr).
The nights were SO cold, that C had to sleep with N too make sure he was warm enough.

The Good
We gathered a ton of drift would to build a retaining (ish) wall in the side yard.
The Bad
Some of it was very heavy.
The Ugly
C put his back out loading a log (read tree) into the back of the truck and I think he's gonna miss some work this week. He's hopped up on robaxesat (sp) as we speak.

The Good
The kids enjoyed sleeping in the trailer
The Bad
They were up very late both nights
The Ugly
They woke up at 6:30 and 7am both mornings.

The Good
The beach was beautiful.
The Bad
The beach was also littered with dead birds and we think a dog skeleton. (NO I didn't take a picture you sickos!)
The Ugly
I sat on a fish carcass. SAT ON A FISH CARCASS.
(always a lady...I screamed SHIT! And ran around wiping my rear and asking C if there was anything stuck to it.)

The Good
My sister, Raging Lesbian took Boomer our 7 yr old retriever cross for the weekend so we would have one less life to worry about.
The Bad
Dori seemed a little stressed about camping, the rope she was tied to freaked her out. She shook a lot and didn't eat much.
The Ugly
Dori had explosive diarrhea all over the bench seat of the dinette in the trailer. Also all over N's pant leg (he was wearing them at the time). She is still recovering.

We had a mostly good weekend though. N kept taking off, but we knew that he was closely watched. Even threats of time outs in the trailer didn't stop him.

The best fun was the beach...though we didn't swim it was fun to watch the kids (and dog) have a run, without much danger, collecting stone and sticks. And oh yeah, checking out dead stuff. Lovely.

No running for me this weekend. I brought my shoes and an out fit. But I didn't get out. Could've been the sheer exhaustion or could've been the earwiggy (PAY) showers. Either way, tonight I run.

I don't care what anyone says, camping is NOT relaxing. I'm SO tired!

Friday, June 25, 2004


Well not really fishing but you get the idea I'm sure.
See ya Monday!

Yup, First Day of Summer Holiday

And I'm up at 6:45am.
How is that justice?
Was I some sort of evil tyrant in another life?
How else would I deserve to have a poodle scratching on the bedroom door of the child whom not only doesn't normally go to school but he is the child that usually sleeps until 8am.
How is that fair?
AND today is the only day in weeks that C decided to "go in early" he had to go to the lumber store and to the "shop" before finishing some woman's floor and washroom. I am sure it's the first day of summer holiday for her too, so definitely she will be pleased to see him an hour early.
Well I better start packing...we're going camping this evening.

OH and the icing on the cake? The high for tomorrow is 14! FOURTEEN! (Celsius of course).

Thursday, June 24, 2004

You asked for it. Posted by Hello

Wednesday, June 23, 2004

My Backyard Battlefield

I am ashamed to admit it.
Really, we aren't dirty people.
We take care of our stuff.
We clean the house (occasionally).

We have EARWIGS.
Lots of them.

We were out watering the newly planted trees (apple and pear) the other night when about 1.3 million earwigs came out the mulch.


I shrieked and ran in the house. I am ok with a lot of bugs (ok well not A LOT of any one bug...but you know..I like a lady bug or two...maybe ONE butterfly at a time), but I am seriously un-ok with earwigs. They are too disgusting. They deserve to die.

So we tried various "GREEN" methods of ridding ourselves of them to no avail. Mostly it just pissed them off and forced them to move into the sand box and bike trailer. We caught about 876 in a bucket of water, but really that was just the tip of the iceberg.

The evening I saw one perched a top my icy cold glass of Canada Dry ginger ale (YES! It was diet!) I FREAKED OUT! I literally JUMPED on my hubby (unfortunately he was sleeping at the time and I think I may have given him a coronary). He started freaking out arms where flailing...I thought he was trying to throw things at it. So I joined in and lobbed the remote across the couch, narrowly missing my drink. Apparently I was wrong and the flailing he was doing was just him trying to dislodge himself from underneath me. So I unwrapped myself from around his head and neck. (he gasped) And hubby killed the bug...with MY slipper. MINE! The one on my foot right now. Somehow he doesn't see how that was wrong. He just muttered something about me being a lunatic and reclined once again on the couch.

So last night, he brought out the big guns. BUG-B-GONE! (echo echo echo). Attached it to our hose and sprayed the living shit out of our backyard, window frames, gardens, then deck. Great! Kill em all! Then he got out of hand and started spraying the climber, the bikes (MINE AGAIN!), the bike trailer, the gate. At this point I think he as playing as he sprayed the edges of the sandbox (and hid bait under the ledge), the front flower gardens, the side gardens, the front step (earwigs have not been seen anywhere other than the back yard). It's all or nothing with that guy.
Anyway this morning I go to let the dogs out and low and behold, not only is my back deck covered in a hue of white, it is also littered with dead bodies!
Dead earwigs EVERYWHERE. It's truly disgusting although also satisfying in an icky sort of way.

Clearly I cannot take the little ones out in the back today, and as you can see from earlier posts the littlest one is NOT to be trusted in the front. I guess we will have to toddle to the park.
Blah...for there I will encounter Mother's of the weird variety.
The last time I was there, some woman asked me the time (I was NOT wearing a watch)and then she proceeded to tell me about how she is allergic to watches and her bio-rhythms make them stop ticking (huh?) and how she works nights as a baker for Tim Hortons but homes schools her kids all day (her kids are UNDER school doesn't that just make it PARENTING!). And how the little one at my feet asking if she can eat my salad does that all the time and it's really embarrassing, but if I could give her some she would fine. Also they lived across the street from the park? In the NEW homes...Their neighbour is a cop (might be a lesbian). They have a dog but no cats. They don't like the colour of their house, but it has to be the same colour as their semi-detached neighbour (lesbian cop) so it will stay that colour for a while.

YEAH all that in oh about 5 or 6 minutes. UGH!

Tuesday, June 22, 2004


12k last night YET again in the rain.
you know in the beginning of summer or spring, running in the rain as opposed to snow is great and lovely and everyone wants to tip toe through the flipping tulips.

NOW? I am SICK of finishing my run in soggy shoes and clothes. Dri-fit my ASS!

But it was a new route that took us right (and I do mean RIGHT) past some cows.
Loved it.

Icing my shin as I type this, as the right one was giving me some grief this morning.
I hate my shins and I think it's safe to say that they hate me.

I have nothing else exciting to report.


That is how boring my life is.

Ooooohhh I had stir fry for is that for exciting.
Then I had a shower since the sweat had crystallized on my face and I was a little wiffy.
(mind boggling I know)
And then (try not to lose your shit on this one) I sat on the couch and KNIT (knitted?) a mitten that for some reason has a VERY pointy top (I am learning...slowly apparently).

Monday, June 21, 2004


Bernard Posted by Hello

Bernard is dead!

Yesterday he was alive
Today, not so much.


Gotta go hide the body and tell B that he flew away.

Moving right along....

OK, thanks to everyone who emailed and commented and told me that I wasn't the only bad parent in the world. HA just kidding. Thanks for sharing and making me feel a bit better.

Robin update:
Bernard is still with us. He eats lots of worms everyday. He flew a little bit yesterday from the couch to my HEAD! (which made me run around the room a little bit while screaming). He pooped on my keyboard lastnight. Hopefully soon he will fly away.

My life seems boring today. That's ok. Really I;ve had enough excitment.

B finishes school this week! ACK! I mean YAY!

Camping this weekend coming. THAT should be interesting. I am considering bringing a laptop so I can blog from there. I may need an intervention.

Running tonight, 12k I think. Not big distances till july 1st weekend.

More later when I have something to write about.

Sunday, June 20, 2004

This is my Dad. Happy Father's Day! Posted by Hello

He's a hoot.

Saturday, June 19, 2004

Oh God

Hi. My name's Pam and I am a bad mother.

Let me tell you a story.

This afternoon 8 yr old B had friends in. One friend in particular that often doesn't listen.

Anyway C was outside with the kids, putting a chicken on the barbeque, I was in the house on the couch suffering from PMS and contemplating eating my own weight in chocolate.

Anyway the chicken was too big for the rotisserie and so C came in to chop it all up into pieces and cook like that.

While he was in here N was out with all the kids playing around. C goes out puts on the chicken and takes a peek around for N. NO N to be found.
He sticks his head in the door and says "Is N in here?"
And as I say NO! I get up from the couch and head for the front door.
Just as I get there, there is knock. I open it to find two women standing on my step.
ONe of them is holding N. And asking me if this was my child.

All I Could say was "OH MY GOD" as she told me that she had found my 18 month old in the middle of street barefoot in jeans and t-shirt running.
Then she asked where he was that he could get away from us like that. I muttered something to her and I thanked her took N and walked into the house. I shouted THANK YOU again as I saw her walking down the drive way shaking her head..clearly judging me.

It seems one of the boys had left the gate open and N slipped out.

I haven't stopped crying since she returned him to me. I fully expect a visit from the Children's Aid Society tomorrow or Monday.

Today I realized that your whole life can change in heart beat.

I am not spell checking or proof reading....sorry if it sucks

It's 8km to Hell

8km last night, no big mileage this week since we are starting half marathon clinic the first week in July.

8km on the road, I chose a route with some hills since I had been avoiding them when I shins were sore.

It was such a hard run! I've had 15k runs that were easier than that! I think it took us 45 minutes and there was more than one drink break. Of course I am a little hormonal and I think that played a role.

The last hill was agony. It's a hill that took me a 6 months to even be able to run. And even then it was with our coach behind me shouting "go go! You can do it!". Anyway of course I ran it last night. I have a thing about walking up hills now, I refuse to do it.
"this hill is my bitch" kind of thing.

Anyway I hope this isn't a new trend where my endurance suddenly bottoms out, just in time for half marathon training. That would not be pleasant.

In other news, I have a brother that is still in Yellowknife, and he told me that the other day an army plane DROPPED a missile on the golf course (yes they play golf in night in the summer!)it was unarmed and no one was hurt but still! How scary is that?

Friday, June 18, 2004

What the @#%&?

On Friday's B brings home all of his work from the week. It's called "The Friday File".
He has been doing this since the beginning of the year. He gets pretty good grades in school and tells us that most of the children think he is the smartest kid in the class.

We are pretty sure the teacher hates him and us. I am not even going to get into why I think that. But I will say that we never get picked as parent volunteers for field trips (we often go anyway) and even though B gets 100% on his spelling test 99% of the time (seriously) he NEVER gets a sticker (other children do). Bitch hates us! (could be the tattoos...not sure).

ANYWAY today he brings home his Friday file and in it is an assignment that is not finished on which she wrote "B had 2 40 minute periods to finish this"


If him not finishing assignments is an issue why am I only hearing about this on the 2nd last week of school!
What is wrong with her!

I'm going to key her car.

You Can't Pick Your Family

My youngest sister (I have 2 younger than me and 1 older than me) was here last night. She lived with us for 5 years up until about a year ago.

Anyway she was here for dinner and a sleep over lastnight, we'll call her that's not nice, we shall call her Raging Lesbian!!! OK, so Raging Lesbian came over for dinner and we had watch N and B so C and I could run to the grocery store for a millisecond. We were gone less than a half an hour.

Now I will fully admit that N has been more than on top of his havoc wreaking game lately. But even I can keep him out of mischief for a half an hour.

We returned to find out that in our 30 minutes of abscense he had:

I) cleaned out the bottom kitchen drawer (junk drawer)and climbed in
II) flushed a sample size bag of jelly bellies down the toiler (there were MY jelly bellies)
III) somehow there is a stalk of celery sitting on my back deck. No reason, no rabbit or other wild life...just sitting there.
IV) he was completely naked
V) there are dinky cars in the vegetable crisper

Now I realise none of these things are earth shattering events but COME ON! In 30 minutes you should've been able to prevent at least the jelly belly incident!

Later I went to my stained glass course only to return 2 hrs later to find a BABY BIRD in a box on my dining room table.

Chris drove past him on the way TO stained glass and just couldn't resist "saving" him since he clearly is too young to fly and was walking around the road.

Box, bird, worms

enough said

Wednesday, June 16, 2004

And What a Run It Was

14k run tonight in PERFECT weather. I mean perfect, around 25(ish) Celsius slightly over cast and smog mostly at bay. Perfect. Around 5k into the run it began to rain slightly a cool mist to keep us going.

It was a good run. No land speed records broken but it was a good pace and I was covered in sweat when we finished. Always the sign of a good run if you ask me.

I committed to the half marathon clinic clinic tonight, we start in 2 weeks. YIKES!!!!!!!!!!!! I am nervous and excited all at once. Our long runs will happen Saturday mornings at 7am! I will be WILLINGLY getting out of bed EARLY on Saturday mornings so I can run until I can't see straight. Where is Pam? And what have you done with her?

One thing with this running I wish for. I wish my head didn't light up like rudolph's nose the minute my feet hit the pavement. I thought originally it was because I was out of shape and I decided to start running in JULY. But it's been a year and through all the weather my head is consistently blood red after a run. Why???? I hate that.

Well I need to go and jump on the exercise bike so I can have a good stretch didn't get to after running for some busy getting hyped about training.

A Toddler After my Own Heart

My youngest boy has recently become obsessed with the fridge. He is CONSTANTLY in there. Sometimes sitting on the bottom shelf juggling eggs and tomatoes. C had a brilliant idea of cutting up some fruit and leaving in the a bowl on the bottom shelf so Shmoopsie can feel independent and have a healthy snack.

Today I made some whipped cream in our whipped cream maker (one of those jobbies that you put the compressed air in and shake er up and voila you have instant whipped cream). And after breakfast Shmoopsie and I had some strawberries and said cream for dessert (hey! Lots of people have dessert after breakfast don't judge me!). It was yummy yummy. We ate and went on with our day.

So JUST now I find ShmoopsieNoah in the fridge. Was he eating left over strawberries? No sir. Was he munching on tiny pieces of watermelon? Nope! Was he feeding the dog prosciutto? Not this time.
No, this time I find our little blond imp in the fridge free basing whipped cream directly from the maker. It was a Kodak moment but alas I use Fuji and it was not handy.

Normal Is A Relative Term.

My parents left yesterday and I swear to god I was so flipping tired that I did close to nothing all day. I blew bubbles with Shmoopsie in the back yard. We had subway for dinner and sat on the couch for the rest of the evening.

So today things are getting back to normal(ish). Noah and I will play all day outside more than likely. And tonight I will run 15 or 16k.
THANK GOD!!! I need to.

Our visit was good. The kids were sad to see them go. I was too actually, the visit was too short.

My small little inner running circle is falling apart. We rarely run together anymore and when we do, we are all going different distances. This convinces me more to sign up for the store's half marathon clinic. At least then I will consistantly have someone to run with. AND I get a free pair of running shorts (that I will never ever wear due to the enormity of my thighs).
So that means Run for the Grapes in September. Half marathon through wine country, (apparently with wine tasting afterwards.. WOOHOO). What am I thinking? A short chubby slow chick running a half marathon? My only wish is to NOT be last.

So maybe today...JUST MAYBE I can read some blogs but that all depends on how much sand Shmoopsie ingests this morning.

Sunday, June 13, 2004


Yup, I'm in a snizzy. And it's ugly.

Friday...RAN! only about 8k, as traditionally friday is 5k night but it was PERFECT running weather so we went a little further. A really really good run.

Saturday looked something like this. scrub scrub scrub, organize organize organize, garden garden garden. scrub scrub scrub clean clean shop shop shop garden garden garden HOLY F#@K it's 5:30pm! cook cook cook!

My parents arrived a little late and a lot tired. We had a little dinner and a lot of chat.
We were up until after 2pm. Today was a wash.

Though C did build an awesome sand box.

I;ve take one of my mother's prescription sleeping pill and I am now beginning to lose all cohesion. Must sleep.

YAY to Rick for his resumed running.
If I can drag my fat ass down the street for 10k ANYONE can!

Friday, June 11, 2004

Shut up and Run

So I shut up and ran last night. It was a quick 35-45 minute run. I don't have a clue how long it was cause I had to get home and get ready to go to my stained glass course.
But it felt good.
I was alone and I don't really like running alone. Well I don't mind if after the first wretched 2 or 3 km then I am fine and think about things other than just how much running sucks sometimes.

I feel a little more sane today and a little less manic. I swear not running makes me mental (ok well more mental than usual).

My parents arrive tomorrow. They are driving about 8hrs to get here from Northern Ontario. They are only staying till Tuesday so they should be able to escape unscathed. Any longer and that would be touch and go.

I STILL have sooo much work to do. I hate cleaning. And impending company always stresses me out, which I inevitably take out on my family. This morning I was grumpy with Breadman and C and I didn't tell either of them I loved them before they left for the day. I forgot. It wasn't intentional and I am sure C is OVER it. But I hope Breadman is too and it didn't stick in his mind at school.

Well I have far to much work to do (read: blogs to read before C comes home and catches me sitting on my arse) and should get it done.

Thursday, June 10, 2004

boring boring bored bored bored or Have I Lost My Running Mojo

NOTHING happening.

Chris was off yesterday. We shopped (bought some AWESOME new stripety capris!!). Bought some trees (apple and pear, did you know it was TACKY to plant such trees in your front yard?)
Ate some bbq-d food.

I was all set to go running, and by that I really do mean dressed, shoed, hydrated and waiting for Avril on the front step. Then the rain started...and Avril hates the rain. So at 5:55pm she called and let me know she would not be joining me OR picking me up. Now the rest of the club leaves the store for a run at about 6pm. And usually I could jump in the truck and make it there in time to find someone to run with. Last night? I took off my hat and fired up the barbie(Q not mattel). I didn't run AGAIN! What is wrong with me! I am going to BALLOON and lose all sorts of endurance. Was planning on running tonight but can't as I have stained glass class.
I WANT TO RUN, I just can't seem to get it together to get out and actually do it.

My Dad made in home safely from the frozen tundra and will be visiting us, along with my mother on the weekend for a bit.
That should be interesting. My kids miss him a lot. He is the kind of man that as soon as he touches a baby, it cuddles down and goes straight to sleep. He will sit in his lazy boy for 3 hours straight with a sleeping baby. I've seen it.

My mother, on the other hand is a cold hearted bitch. Well not always a bitch, but always cold. Babies are very anxious around her and like to keep her at arms length. Not that she's mean to them or anything. But it's like after giving birth to 5 of her own, she's empty of any baby squishiness or something. She has no more cuddles to give.

Anyway they are coming down here with the sole purpose of spoiling my children rotten. As far as I can tell that's it! A new bike for the Breadman, a new climber for Shmoopsie. (new running shoes for me HEEE!)

So now I have to clean my house...and not just clean it. I mean CLEAN it. UBER CLEAN. Obsessive compulsive clean. And right now it's the opposite of all of that.

Wednesday, June 09, 2004

remaining calm

I need a paper bag.
Can't breathe.All is lost.
HALO SCAN IS DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

Ok....I give

-- Name: Pam
-- Birth date: 1972
-- Birthplace: Mining Town in Northern Ontario
-- Current Location: Southern Ontario
-- Eye Color: sometimes blue,sometimes grey,sometimes green.
-- Hair Color: right now...light brown with blonde highlights
-- Height: 4'9" (don't laugh)
-- Righty or Lefty: Righty
-- Zodiac Sign: Taurus

-- Your heritage: Irish,British. (ok..newfie)
-- The shoes you wore today: tevas
-- Your weakness: chocolate
-- Your fears: heights and getting REALLY fat
-- Your perfect pizza: double cheese...SAUCE!....pepperoni and pineapple
--Goal you'd like to achieve: half maraton in the fall

-- Your most overused phrase on AIM: “yeah”
-- Your first waking thoughts: "Is Chris still home?"
-- Your best physical feature: Size. hmm...a toughie. my eyebrows
-- Your most missed memory: Get back to you on that one

-- Pepsi or Coke: Diet Pepsi Twist
-- McDonald's or Burger King: Subway
-- Single or group dates: group (we have two kids single is NOT an option)
-- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Nestea
-- Chocolate or vanilla: CHOCOLATE
-- Cappuccino or coffee: tea

-- Smoke: for 10 yrs, I quit 5 years ago. Cold turkey
-- Cuss: Fuck yeah!
-- Sing: CONSTANTLY much to my family's chagrin!
-- Take a shower everyday: Yes sometimes TWICE! OOOOOH!
-- Do you think you've been in love: Yes, I flippin HOPE SO! We've been together for 10 frickin years!
-- Want to go to college: Been there...and who knows might do it again.
-- Liked high school: oh yes...a little TOO much.
-- Want to get married: DONE!
-- Believe in yourself: next!
-- Get motion sickness: No
-- Think you're attractive: meh..I guess, though I think I peaked around 25.
-- Think you're a health freak: FAR FROM IT. Trying to be healtier though
-- Get along with your parent(s): yes- ish
-- Like thunderstorms: Yes and sometimes no
-- Play an instrument: Does the recorder count? Cause i can play a WICKED Marry had a Little Lamb

LAYER SIX: In the past months...-- Drank alcohol: Oh lord Yes
-- Smoked: No
-- Done a drug: No
-- Made Out: hello? MARRIED!
-- Gone on a date: yes.
-- Gone to the mall?: Yes
-- Eaten an entire box of Oreos?: yes.....
-- Eaten sushi: blech!
-- Been on stage:
-- Been dumped: No.
-- Gone skating: No.
-- Made homemade cookies: Yes
-- Dyed your hair: yes
-- Stolen Anything: yes (it was brownie from my husband)

-- Played a game that required removal of clothing: yes
-- If so, was it mixed company: yes (I told you I enjoyed highschool)
-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Oh lord Yes.
-- Been caught "doing something": I don't get it. So I'm gonna say no
-- Been called a tease: No
-- Gotten beaten up: No
-- Shoplifted: I'm going to say no to this
-- Changed who you were to fit in: nah
-- Age you hope to be married: I am married.
-- Numbers and Names of Children: 2 kids. Brendan and Noah
-- Describe your Dream Wedding: No wedding..just living in sin for eternity.
-- How do you want to die: ick! I refuse to answer that question.
-- Where you want to go to college: Since I'm not 17 I am going to skip this.
-- What do you want to be when you grow up: young
-- What country would you most like to visit: Germany (hubby is german)

-- Number of drugs taken illegally: HA...again with the highschool years...yeah...lets jsut say...more than a few
-- Number of people I could trust with my life: 1.
-- Number of CDs that I own: 30-40.
-- Number of piercings: 0
-- Number of tattoos: 3
-- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: uh...none?
-- Number of scars on my body: A few.
-- Number of things in my past that I regret: 6

OK this is when he is creeping towards the window. This is a better one but his jammie pants are pulled up WAY to high as not to accidentally lose them I guess Posted by Hello

ok he is really hard to see in one, but he is haning on the the white looking structure in the background. (that would be the bedroom window)  Posted by Hello

For Now We'll Call him Tom.

C went out to lock up the truck lastnight. He was gone a long time. So I went to investigate on my way to bed. I found him standing (shirtless in jammie pants) in the middle of our front yard flower garden looking up at our roof.

There was something up there, we could hear it scurrying in the eaves trough and squeaking...kind of.
C was CONVINCED it was something in dire need of help so he grabbed the closest wildlife saving tool...the rake (and not that wimpy flexible leaf kind)! So there he was, shirtless in the garden, sticking a rake blindly into the eaves.
The rustling stopped for a minute, clearly assessing this strange new threat and it's makeshift weapon. But resumed quite shortly afterwards either confused by the rake and ignoring it or completely panicked by the rake and making an effort to scare it off.

Immediately C flew into the house and up the stairs to our bedroom. I gathered the dogs, locked the front door (put the dangling rake away) and raced up behind him. I found our bedroom empty. The curtain in our window was clearly moved and the screen appeared to be MISSING from our window.

That's right he was ON THE ROOF! (there is a tiny roof outside out bedroom window). By the time I get to the window he had "saved" the animal so much that it had worked it's way down the eaves trough to the neighbours side of the house (we own a semi...yes not only are we WHITE TRASH but we're also POOR WHITE TRASH). C is now standing on their side of the roof holding on to the their window..their BEDROOM window trying to do god knows what to this poor animal that may or may not be stuck and in need of rescue.

Let me recap, my shirtless husband is standing on the neighbour's roof hanging on to their bedroom window, leaning precariously over the edge at MIDNIGHT.
Whatever animal was there was silent now, no doubt scared speechless by the deranged lunatic chasing it across a roof. So now it looks like he is there for NO REASON. Luckily (I think) the neighbours did not look out their window and I don't think C looked in theirs. Though I did see him peer into their closet window..apparently her's is WAY more organized than mine...bitch.

Now..I did take pictures of this...but I can't post them. You see, he doesn't know about this blog and if he happens to stumble upon it he maybe upset that he is IN his jammies...on the midnight..

welcome to my life

Monday, June 07, 2004

Whoa...who turned up the heat

I am embarrassed to say this. But I skipped my run tonight. To eat hamburgers with my family in the cool comfort of our air conditioned truck. It is SO freakin hot out. All of a sudden it;s hot.
And tomorrow it's supposed to be even hotter. I SHOULD'VE run and I hate myself for not running. I feel guilty about it. What is that about?

No wonder I still so much weight to lose!

The running posse is going to the race without me tomorrow night. They will be running in what will feel like 40 degrees Celsius OR FUCKING HOT! To almost all Canadians.

We don't have central air in this house. How archaic is that? When we have the money to have it installed, I have other things I can spend it on cause it's cooler out.

whoa is me.

Forgive me if I only whine my way through a post or two in the next few days.

Bought the Breadman a Slip'n'slide tonight. How much fun are those? How is I made it through 32 years without drunken slip'n'sliding (well this kind anyway).

I am sure that might change this summer. (my poor poor neighbours).

since the dogs took over the little swimmy pool, we bought Shmoopsie a little fire hyrdrant sprinkler. He doesn't use the pool anyway..and just wants to shake the hose around.

My money's on him having a concussion courtesy of said slip'n'slide by summers end. God willing there will be no broken bones, but I'm not holding my breath

Shamelessly Stolen from EVERYONE

WHat does THAT mean? I want a chocolate heart!!!!!! That's not fair! Fuckers!

fire heart
Heart of Fire

What is Your Heart REALLY Made of?
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MONDAY! Bloody Monday.

It's Monday already and I don't feel like I've had a weekend. I didn't get to run at all this weekend. I didn't even get to sleep in instead. I have a feeling this is what the summer will be like. Whoa is me.

Chris worked ALL weekend. He is painting the outside of a century home in a nearby town. He had an older gentleman working for him. On Saturday this man fell from his ladder and shattered his elbow. SHATTERED IT! So Chris spent the day taking him to the hospital in that town for xrays and concussion exams. They were told he would have to go to Hamilton for surgery to wire his elbow back together. The man requested that they made arrangements for the operation in Kitchener as that is where he lives. Fine..done.
So the plan was for Chris to drive him back here to our house (where his car was parked) and Chris's father (the man's original long time friend and employer) would meet them and drive him to Kitchener. Well before they arrived my father in law called to tell me he couldn't meet them here and that maybe Chris should just drive the man back to the city in his car and father in law would bring chris back here.
Fine., I said that I didn't think Chris would mind that at all, and that I would get him to call as soon as he arrived.
When he arrived he told the man to get in his car and he would just come in and say hello and be right out.
So he comes in and I immediately tell him to call his father...while he is on the phone the man DRIVES away..drives himself HOME.
He is totally hopped up on goofballs and his right arm is in a half cast and completely immobilized. Not to mention he may very well be concussed as his head clearly came into contact with some hard surface.
Also, I should mention that a few years ago this man was at a stop light (sober!) and there was a motorcycle in from of him and a tractor trailer in from of the motorcycle. Apparently the other side of the light got a green and the man thought the green was for him, and immediately hit the gas....and the motorcycle...killing him instantly.

Needless to say no one was terribly excited that the prospect of a drugged man behind the wheel. But off he went. We assume he got home safe as the news didn't mention anything to the contrary.

AND as a result of being a man short, a two rain days last week. Chris had to work yesterday too. POOPY

My parents are coming this weekend. I will let you know how I feel about that as the time draws nearer.

Also, Old Mill race tomorrow night...haven't decided if I am going to do it or not. I haven't been able to train really. My last few runs have included no hills (sad I know). And this course is H-I-L-L-Y! But soo beautiful and it's at 7:00pm! Neato!

Anywho...tah for now.

Sunday, June 06, 2004

No really, she did this to herself. Posted by Hello

Saturday, June 05, 2004

Pet Peeves

I know I'm not perfect, I mean...FAR FROM it really but there are something about other people that truly bother me. And yes I may judge them harshly for it. BUT COME ON! The following is a list of things I despise.

(in no particular order really)
1. people that chew with their mouths open!
2. people that litter
3. people that berate their children
4. people that misuse the word "fetish" i.e. "I have a chair fetish" says the antique dealer. (do you like to have sex with them or on them? Do you lick them? Why are you telling me this, for I will surely not buy this chair now!)
5. People that pronounce it Cal-GARY not Calgary. (I don't live there but still.)
6."yous guys" (GAH!)
7.wet hair in public
8.difficult sending food back at restaurants, snippy to clerk etc.
9.little girls in slutty clothes!
10.grated cheese (other than Parmesan) on bruscetta (sp) lights at anytime after Jan 5th and before November 1st (and I am being liberal)
13.the fact that oreos can make you fat nosey back yard neighbours
15.the meter reader that leaves my back gate open
16.the fact that I am the worst house keeper in history.
17.that I am a slow runner
18.shin splints
19.politics. GOD HOW ANNOYING is this election! I don't want to vote of any of them! I have no idea what I will do on election day. I may just spoil my ballot.
20.people that smoke WHILE riding their bike
31.people at the drive-thru always assuming you want coke with that.

Now i know most of things are petty and stupid but every now and then I just can't take it anymore and I need to vent. Keep in mind there are a million more.
Tomorrow perhaps I will do the flip side.

Friday, June 04, 2004

Are you running hard? Or hardly running?

5k Friday, though half of our group took off for 12 which I would have gladly joined if I had known ahead of time! I did not have much a pre-run snack and there would have surely fallen on my face 6 or 7k out.

I did run a hard fast 5 though, the kind that makes your legs are a little shakey at the end. It felt great (again) to run pain free.

I think though, that my recent injury and subsequent lay off has put in bad favour with my most buddiest running buddies. I do believe they are more than a little miffed that I am not doing a 10k race with them this Tuesday evening. I took a week OFF! Yes I know I can still run 10k and just did on Wednesday night, however I seriously doubt I can race 10k.

So go and do it and have fun.

But now they are acting all clicky and sort of leaving me in the dust cause they are "IN TRAINING". Whatever Trevor.

Oh well, I am so on the road to recovery. I kept up just fine tonight, I did feel like we were speeding along though..holy crap.

Felt good none the less.

Nothing happening here this weekend, Hubby is working so that means I am too! So much for sleeping in. BASTARD!

Pardon, I've just been summoned to look under my hubbies eyelid with a flash light.

See? And you thought we weren't any fun!

Amusing Myself

Outrightly stolen from Chris.
But fun none the less.

Answer the following questions in the comment box:
1. Who are you?
2. Have we ever met?
3. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
4. Describe me in one word.
5. What reminds you of me?
6. If you could give me anything, what would it be?
7. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
8. Are you going to put this on your weblog and see what I say about you?
9. What do you love like a fat kid loves cake?
10. What makes you come back here?

Thursday, June 03, 2004

Small Town Living

Aside from the obvious perks of moving back to a small town. There are some advantages that you just wouldn't (usually) find in a big city.
A couple of these things made themselves very clear to me this week.

I bought new shoes yesterday but did not give the store owner a penny. I did not even sign a slip. I simply was a given part of the receipt and told that it would be fine to pay whenever was good for me.

In the mail today came a hand addressed envelope, inside was a hand written note apologizing for the delay in getting our pizza last week or the week before (we hadn't even really complained just mentioned that it hadn't arrived yet when it was 30 minutes late. It mentioned hat our business was important to them and that they hoped to see us in their establishment again soon. Accompanying it was a couple for 2 medium 4 topping pizzas and a 2l bottle of pop.

Made me feel happy about living here all over again. In Kitchener this would never have happened. NEVER.

I mean I would've just had to wait till the weekend to buy my shoes and the pizza probably wouldn't have ever showed up and if it did it would've been cold.

I will take the time right now to report that my shins are feelin fine today! No more pain..clearly the week long rest helped! So did not running in worn out shoes. I can't wait to go out again tomorrow night. Sadly only 5k though.

What has happened to the manners of children?
I mean some of the crap these kids do when they come and play I would have been tarred and feathered for! Drawn and quartered even!

This afternoon a kid came looking for Brendan...they played out front for a bit then Brendan came in looking for something and went out the back door. This kid (whom I have met but twice!) OPENS my front door and shouts in 'BRENDAN!'
I was appalled. Can you imagine doing that? At house you barely know? Not to mention this kid only shows up to ask Brendan to go to the store so Brendan will buy him candy (we let him go once and they we caught on, besides 8 is too young to go to the store by yourself).
Also, everytime Bren has kids over in the backyard, they ask for food...or drinks, usually both.
Again...severe pain would have followed this for me.

Do you have any chocolate bars?

WHAM! A wooden spoon comes out of nowhere and knocks me on my ass.
That's how it would've been for me.
I wouldn't have even thought of ASKING for food at someone's house.

Kids these days.

Wednesday, June 02, 2004

Shoes are better than.....

I love buying shoes..I really do.
I especially like buying running shoes.
You go in to get fitted. It's at least a half hour event.
And you spend a good amount of money. My new shoes cost me (with taxes) $175.95
And they will only last me for the next 4-6 months before I start hurting and needing new ones. Eek.'s story for you.
Running along..happy as a clam that my shins are not causing me to stop and stretch or stop and limp or stop and walk.
I am trotting at a nice even (read: slow) pace. My friend Avril and I are having a great chat about father's day gifts for our hubbies (She gave me a great idea I will pass along to you all at the end of this post) when suddenly we hear a ding a ling a ling. Oh you should know, that we are on a trail. The rail trail actually which links two cities and goes nicely through our town. It's a popular trail. . ding a ling a ling.
hmmm what's that sound?
ding a ling a ling
strange! As we look around...up in the trees..down at the ground. DUH! What could it be.
Finally Avril (clearly the brains in this running duo) looks BEHIND us and see a bike. He was still far enough a way that we could make room for him. So logically, Avril goes to one side and I go to the other. Not brilliant cause he has to ride on the little island of grass running up the middle. So we both decide we should be on the same side of the trail. Like a fricking comedy routine we change sides...both of us are now on opposite sides of the trail.
Mean while the man on the bike is now shouting "on the left, on the left"
I am shouting back "are you coming up on the left? Or do you want us on the left?"
And then we switched again.
And finally, Avril yelled at me to stay put, as and she joined me on my side (clearly I was the one with a handle on the situation). Bike man drove on by chuckling and shaking his head (I am sure he was speechless at our choreography).
There needs to be signs like in the subway escalator...walk left stand left bike right. I NEED to know these rules! is what Avril did on father's day when her kids were young.

She would give her kids cash and tell them to invite Dad for lunch (their treat) and then a mini putt game..ALONE. So Dad would be THRILLED to have the day with his kids and Avril would have the afternoon to herself.

Chris and the boys can go for lunch and mini-putt or movie..and I will have a beauty day! tea and magazines, maybe a facial and some cookies.


Tuesday, June 01, 2004


So this afternoon is was sunny and warm and lovely.

Then suddenly..HAIL!

Ice falling from the sky while it's 21 degress (celcius)?
How is this NOT an apocolyptic event?

I don't understand the whole concept of hail.

Gone to buy new running shoes...more later.

A phenomenon in Stupid

Do you remember my new doggie Dori? She's little, she's cute, she's white and fluffy. She's dumb as a stick.

What is with that?
Yesterday we went out for about an hour. And had the audacity to leave Dori at home. We returned an hour later to an aroma so vile it's indescribable. I left Kensington Market smell in it's dust. It ate pig farm smell for breakfast. You have not smelled rank until you smelled my living room yesterday evening.

And there on the new luxurious area rug (of course) was a diaper once filled with poop, shredded to bits. Bits of poop all over the living room.


Shop vac was employed.
Blind vast vacuuming ensued.
And yet the stench lingered.
And lingered
And lingered

DORI had baby poop breath.

So let's regroup here.

Occasionally and usually several times a BABY smells like baby poop. Consequently my garbage can smells like baby poop.
And now, my DOG smells like baby poop.


I should buy stock in Glade.

So I fed Dori a mint and all seems better now.

I am however, oddly curious as to what her poop will smell like today.
Well not THAT curious.